It starts with the phone call...

The phone call came after my mother-in-law came over to tell me that our phone had been off of the hook and my brother was trying to call me.

(My daughter likes playing with the phone and we let her because it is cute when she holds it up to her ear and says "hullo hullo.")

When my mother-in-law told me that my brother had been unable to get through, I looked for the phone and saw that it had been activated for 90 minutes.

I hung up the phone and called my brother - whom I'll be referring to as Number 2 (he's the second and final child my parents had but it's also funny to call him Number 2...if you have a fifth grade sense of humor, you understand).

I could tell he was agitated and driving. Something was wrong with Dad and he was heading over to his house right now. He was just a couple of miles from my father's house and I was about 20 miles away. There was no point in two of us racing over there at the same time - we had had false alarms about my father's health before.

"Just get there and call me when you do. I'll be waiting here for your call," I said to him. He ended the call and immediately another phone call came through. It was my uncle.

"VW, this is your Uncle. I'm sorry to tell you this. Your dad is gone"

Those are very strange words to hear. I can feel my brain shutting down all emotions and start to power back up like a computer in safe mode. I've got decisions to make. A younger brother to take care of. And I don't have time to be upset or grieve.

And how did I respond to my uncle?

"Okay."

That's all I could say. I couldn't tell him that I was sorry that his only brother had just died. I couldn't tell him that I had been a block away from my father's house only three hours prior to this phone call but I didn't stop by to say hi. I just said "Okay."

"VW, let me put your grandmother on the phone."

Both of my father's parents are still alive. They are 89 and 88. My grandfather has lost all of his hearing. My grandmother has lost her sight. The function together like MasterBlaster from Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome.

I don't care how old you are, a mother should never have to bury a child. My grandmother's heart was broken.

She was crying and saying stuff to me but I was already on to what I needed to do next. Both my mother and mother-in-law were looking at me for clues as to what was going on but it is hard to read someone when they are just going through a mental checklist.

I got off the phone and told them both that I needed to go to my father's house because he had passed away. It was 6:00 p.m. on July 14th. I was heading to the 22 west to drive the 20 miles back to the house I grew up in to meet my brother and to begin what would be an amazing journey.

VW