Grandpa got ran over by a lathe, dear - part two
I finally realize that there is only one hospital that my grandparents would be able to go to so before my next meeting starts, I sneak out to make the phone call.
The hospital's operator transfers me to the ER and I ask the person on the other line if my grandpa has been admitted.
She replies that it is now against federal law to give out that information.
I remain calm and explain my situation.
"I'm at least five hours away and I haven't been able to get a hold of anyone. I just want to know if my grandpa is okay."
"Well, would it be helpful to know that if you called their house that nobody would pick up the phone."
Okay, they're at the hospital.
"And would it be helpful to know that if you called their house in about two hours, somebody would pick up the phone."
And they are leaving soon. I hope he's not refusing to be admitted.
He's a stubborn old S.O.B. and I love him for it. He's a man's man. Still hunting duck in Mexico at 90 years old.
My favorite story about my grandpa comes from Number 2. It stems from a conversation that he had with my grandparents a few years back.
My grandpa was telling Number 2 about what you need for your boat if you were going out on a lake to go fishing. The last required item was a Folgers coffee can.
"What do you use the coffee can for?" asked Number 2.
"You take that with you just in case you have to take a leak," my grandpa responded.
Number 2 didn't get it. "Why don't you just stand up and pee over the side of the boat?"
Without blinking an eye, my grandpa smiled and said.
"I don't want to get my dick wet."
VW
The hospital's operator transfers me to the ER and I ask the person on the other line if my grandpa has been admitted.
She replies that it is now against federal law to give out that information.
I remain calm and explain my situation.
"I'm at least five hours away and I haven't been able to get a hold of anyone. I just want to know if my grandpa is okay."
"Well, would it be helpful to know that if you called their house that nobody would pick up the phone."
Okay, they're at the hospital.
"And would it be helpful to know that if you called their house in about two hours, somebody would pick up the phone."
And they are leaving soon. I hope he's not refusing to be admitted.
He's a stubborn old S.O.B. and I love him for it. He's a man's man. Still hunting duck in Mexico at 90 years old.
My favorite story about my grandpa comes from Number 2. It stems from a conversation that he had with my grandparents a few years back.
My grandpa was telling Number 2 about what you need for your boat if you were going out on a lake to go fishing. The last required item was a Folgers coffee can.
"What do you use the coffee can for?" asked Number 2.
"You take that with you just in case you have to take a leak," my grandpa responded.
Number 2 didn't get it. "Why don't you just stand up and pee over the side of the boat?"
Without blinking an eye, my grandpa smiled and said.
"I don't want to get my dick wet."
VW
posted by JVW at 7:05 PM
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